After nine years of struggling to conceive, I received God's grace!
On December 10, 2014, I gave birth to a bouncing and beautiful baby boy. To this day, I can't help but look into his sweet face and feel blessed to be his Mom. It's amazing to think that for years, I never thought I would be a Mom and yet, here he is. My perfect, sweet, rambunctious little boy.
My journey to parenthood was long and arduous. There were times I cursed God, turned my back on my faith, questioned everything I was doing, and more.
Am I proud of this behavior?
Nope! However, I know that through my pain and anguish God never left my side despite me turning my back on him. I believe I had to endure the heartache and suffering that I did for me to see the light.
In full transparency, I was incredibly unhappy, depressed, and quite frankly hated life. I was miserable. I walked around with a fake smile and told everyone life was great, when in reality I had never felt more alone, broken, ashamed, and lost. Those nine years were some of the darkest days of my life, and I don't wish them onto anyone.
To share a bit about my journey to parenthood, let me start by backing up to when I was diagnosed with infertility.